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August 31, 2013
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my mother tells me that i should be ashamed
for dipping my baby carrots in salad dressing,
that my food doesn't need the salt i sprinkle on it.

my afternoon tea doesn't need any sugar, skip
the lemonade and drink the water instead.

do you really need that?

her sharp tone echoes like military orders in the face of combat.

she tells me that at my age, her jean size was half of mine
and i resist the urge to tell her that maybe that means she
had half the character i do.

shopping with her, she butts heads with a body-image complex,
telling me to quit fooling myself and pick the next size up.
i shock her time and time again when i cram my corners into
every article of clothing i selected on my own.

how will you ever get married?

& i wish i could tell her how boys have seen me naked
in the emotional sense of the word, how they have found
truth and honor ready to burst from my so-called "fat rolls."

she will never know that i am a garden with an unlocked gate
and that each of my visitors plants a flower before leaving.

i invite people in with the gleam in my eyes
and the way i bend language, so mother:

i am sorry that the width of my gut is not to your liking.
my suitcase of memories may be overweight in your eyes,
but within me lies every story i have ever been told.

i am holding every DNA strand that has ever coincided with mine.
it's as if i'm bearing the child of my own set of paradigms and you
are the poet not ready to write an apology.

it's okay, i'll do it for the both of us:

i am sorry for treating my body like a canvas meant to shed its paint.
i have learned to love my ink stains.
irrelevant, but i was eating the aforementioned baby carrots when i wrote this
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Daily Deviation

Given 2013-09-18
146 pounds by ~learningtobefree puts a refreshing spin on the criticism we've all heard at least once in our lives. ( Featured by Nichrysalis )
:icongrowinluvhandles:
growinluvhandles Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2014  Student Writer
A powerful piece of writing!  If only people were not so cruel and judgmental!
Reply
:icongrowinluvhandles:
growinluvhandles Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Student Writer
You are such a great writer!  What wonderful expression!

Sorry that you are treated so badly by someone who loves you.
Reply
:iconagonizingswordfish:
AgonizingSwordfish Featured By Owner May 11, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Gorgeous writing :)
Reply
:iconlearningtobefree:
learningtobefree Featured By Owner May 11, 2014  Student Writer
thank you
Reply
:iconwolfgang627:
Wolfgang627 Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014  Student General Artist
beautiful
Reply
:iconflummo:
flummo Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014  Student Writer
"she will never know that i am a garden with an unlocked gate
and that each of my visitors plants a flower before leaving."

and that last pair of lines oh. :heart: Congratulations on the DD.
Reply
:iconlearningtobefree:
learningtobefree Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014  Student Writer
Thanks!
Reply
:icontommyboywood:
tommyboywood Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
carrots be good, ya
Reply
:iconmuscularteeth:
muscularteeth Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2014
it's very diifficult having a mother who's insecure with her body image, and you capture that conflict so well. i do feel the "...half the character i do..." line seems a bit misguided in its intent and skews the message of body positivity, but i also understand the emotion behind it. this is a strong poem because of its layered complexity; the struggle is palpanle
Reply
:iconlearningtobefree:
learningtobefree Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2014  Student Writer
thanks so much!
Reply
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